The pigs that squeal the loudest…

The Banned PhotoWhile my husband Jesse Jackman has been spending the last two days fighting back — successfully — against certain bullies cowards who would have his Facebook page taken down, I’ve been alternating between shooting a scene for Raging Stallion Studios and drafting this post while sitting in their breakroom wearing nothing but a jockstrap. À la Benjamin Franklin quipping that if he’d had more time he’d have sent a shorter letter, I’ll just post what I’ve already written on the matter and hope for the best.

These bigots and bullies are people who (despite Christ) are anxious to cast the first stones in order to deflect attention from their own weak and limping lives. Especially by being on Facebook, however, they live in the most transparent of glass houses. For the vast majority of us who are the objects of their attacks, our houses are intact… because although we find their beliefs foolish and hurtful, we don’t go around baiting fundamentalists and homophobes into dark alleyways and beating them bloody. Their actions speak for their stunted character and the weakness of their minds; few of these hate messages are couched in any sort of decent grammar or spelling, and none have any more cohesive logic than soundbites and doggerel can convey (the impotent “Adam and Steve” barb leaping to mind). Name calling, argument ad hominem, and violence, real or threatened, are the last resorts of cowards when they know they’ve lost the argument.

We as gay men and women have no need to make anyone feel small just so we can feel big. We ARE big. We’ve been here since the beginning of time and history, present in every society on earth and huge contributors to intellect, humanity, and civilization. We are capable of committed love, of being part of our families and creating new ones, of relating to a spiritual higher power, and of being true friends to anyone who would befriend us. We will be here until the end of the world and probably beyond, and we are proud to show the world all of this on Facebook or in any of our glass houses.

Let these other people go and shatter their own homes with their “I am without sin” stones if they think their religion demands it. They have no right to break ours. And the pigs that squeal the loudest are the ones that know their time is just about up.


  1. Andre says:

    I certainly agree. Very well stated. Got my vote!!!!

  2. Dirk, you have proven something I have known since I first saw you nude: you have bigger balls than me.

    If this was me, I would have taken it personally, but you took your Loving, wonderful, and delicious-looking husband and shoved your tongue in his mouth and fused yours to his in the process.

    Thank you for Re-Minding me of how BIG I AM already.

  3. John W Berresford says:


  4. I’m so proud of you, babe. Great post. xoxo

  5. Jack McNulty says:

    One of our saints said “All the way to heaven is heaven”. Sadly there is a puritanical streak in many people that just can’t stand the idea that people somewhere might be enjoying themselves. Keep up your good work. You both are teaching the world the joy of two persons being genuinely present to one another. I’m so glad that you are willing to teach the world this song.

  6. You’ve gotten more death threats than what I saw yesterday? I think your letter writing friend is protesting a tad to loudly, otherwise why would he give a shit what you do? He obviously feel’s threatened by you for some reason (jealousy maybe or he might see a bit of himself in you). In any case he isnt doing anything but making himself look stupid

  7. Dennis McQuaid says:

    You guys keep doing what U do! Living well is the best revenge!!!

  8. RGSLoan says:

    Bound in love – bound to be loved – the tie that binds. Why would anyone hate that? I’m too old and seen too much hate; and when it’s religious hate, it only proves how small a soul can be and the darkness it holds near its heart: a sadness your joy erases.

  9. FLYFOTO says:

    Years ago, FLYFOTO joined that exclusive club of people who were unceremoniously booted from Facebook for allegedly violating their terms of service guidelines. Apparently my images of men, which I considered as art, were much too salacious for their tastes. At the time I was terribly confused and frustrated as I had not posted anything there that in my opinion was objectionable. I walked away from that experience with two salient impressions;

    1. There were individuals in the Facebook community who were extremely narrow minded and potentially – very homophobic.

    2. The Facebook experience, at least for me, was one that was not a positive one. While it indeed connected me to an audience, it was also one that inhibited me from expressing myself genuinely and openly.

    Alas, the world is not as enlightened as we would hope it would be and Facebook serves itself up as a prime example of that. What Jesse just experienced unfortunately, is that there are those who cannot, under any circumstances, rise above their own fear and bigotry to respect or appreciate the differences of others.

    You are both entitled to feel anger and frustration over this experience. But remember, Facebook only brings to light the problems that surround us still in life. As troubling as it is, hate is an insidious and painful reality.

  10. Luciano says:

    I didn’t see anything offensive about the image but love between two guys. You and Jesse have all my support. Love you both and thanks for providing us with male action. We have to give big thanks to all gay porn stars for showing the world that men-on-men action is part of human nature. For decades, gay porn stars have been tearing down the walls of prejudice, making it possible for people to get used to homosexuality. I wish you love and success.

  11. Sasha Ranger says:


    It blows my mind that in this day and age, we still have to FIGHT for the right to love, and demonstrate that love, publicly?

    Quite frankly, people who hate couples because they are gay, inter-racial, inter-faith or who deviate from what they believe the norm to be, simply have no notion of what love means. And while we are on that topic, what is the norm anyway? Who decides? The one who shouts the loudest? The one who beats the biggest drum?

    It’s not about whether you are gay, or a porn star…or both 😉 It’s about respect. How about respecting people’s right to choose, people’s right to be themselves and people’s right to express love towards those they cherish?

    I maintain that if you do not like something, you are free to leave. Close the webpage, unlike the facebook page, unfollow on twitter – do what you need to, and leave. ‘Cos here’s the thing – other people are quite happy there and who are you with your narrow-minded, self-righteous indignation, to decide what is suitable for viewing by the rest of the online community? What makes you so important that you take the role of censor and moral police? How dare you assume that you have any such right in my life and that of others? #egoalert

    Personally, I love seeing pictures of you and Jesse – you remind me of what love looks like. It is so obvious how crazy the two of you are about each other – how can that be wrong? The basis of every spiritual path out there is Love – anyone claiming that the bond between the two of you is wrong, needs to open their eyes and take a good hard look, ‘cos from where I am standing – you guys have something really beautiful… and worth fighting for – and guess what – there are 1000s of people who see the same and they will fight for you guys too…


    Sasha Ranger

  12. Samuel Legg says:

    Hi Dirk,

    You are my Hero for standing up for Jesse and telling the people who just can’t accept true love. You are the man everyone wishes they had for a partner. I am struggling myself to come clean to everyone that I am gay myself because of fear of backlash. Maybe one day I’ll have someone like you to help me overcome this and appreciate me for who I am.
    If we were to ever meet, I would like to buy you a drink.

  13. Andy Wilson says:

    Hi Guys,

    I have read every post in here and think wow what articulate fans you have. I think the letter is one that needs to be seen by more than the few that have posted on here. I hope this goes way above and beyond this. I am happy to see a loving couple that have stood their ground and are willing to speak up. I am out and loud. I personally have posted worse things than your photo’s and have yet to be banned. i think the world is slowly changing, however as someone stated we still have to deal with these types of people and more so than I care to admit. I say stand strong and fight as we have not won, but we are making a difference. I send my love to you both

  14. I absolutely agree and very well said! I was reported on facebook for posting an image of a mans butt. Well, half of his butt. The rest was covered by pants. But because I am an author of Male/Male romances, I was reported and put in facebook jail. I’m not going to stop what I’m doing, not for them–not for anyone. I wish you all the love in this world and hope that someday, everyone will be free to love who they want without living in fear.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *